PLEASE REMEMBER THE FOLLOWING WORKS ARE THERAPEUTIC CREATIVE WORKS!
Post Examination!
Give a Stalker back their Life before they Take
a Life?
So Lavinia...during this interview we will
attempt to tie up loose ends and then tackle the main bane subject matter.
Does it begin with nosiness? I just had a feeling
you would have more to say on the matter...what exactly did you mean about
predictive nosiness?
Lavinia: seems like its back to the days of I
know what you are going to do next....rolled out and more widespread from on
generation to the next?
...and that feels like what though...what is it like exactly to have someone treat you
like that...and to see someone locked into wasting there own time doing that to
you?
Lavinia: dear God to be the focus of someone so
obsessed with you that they spend, spend, spend....spend the time to recreate
the reflection to prove they knew...every choice I would make? My mind my
internal private ways has to be externally attacked day after day.
Is it also hard because you don’t seem to be
able to resolve who or what it is?
Lavinia: yes you can only hope such a person
will wear themselves out! As some stalkers do. Triggers do stop and some can
naturally heal and move on.
Is that why you turned the phrase give a
stalker back their life before they take a life?
Lavinia: It refers only to where possible. I
acknowledge and recognize it is a very blanket bold and potentially dangerous
statement to make! There are a myriad of
reasons why a person gets triggered into
the behaviour pattern...despite their bravado and fear they go onto cause...it
is an incredibly sad state to see someone disintegrate into given the power of
the human psyche and intellect and all that it can accomplish!
Yes! That is very true. If you put a stalker up
against a high achiever it could look very different.
Lavinia: The thing is stalkers are also high
functioning achievers, and that is part of the big and costly problem each and
stalker is, and has been because a stalker legacy of damage lasts life times. Generation
after generations is continually affected by either jeep up the behaviour, or
by beíng forced to continually foot the bill for those who continue a stalkers
legacy! They are not all bums on the
street. I was only describing one description. What we must be educated about
is every variant of each individual who suffers from that need to have so much
control....
Variant?
Lavinia: scenarios maybe a better description.
How many ways can we foresee and teach and understand the traps a stalker natural
sets. As early as a school child i remember being unsettled by someone. But i
could not articulate it as feeling or being stalked. I would have said bullied
but not stalked. Which would have meant something different not a life time
of being pursued, accused, spited,
sleighted, picked on, put down, and then left with the bill each and every
time. Psychological, mentally, physically, and financially. Not just me
remember this all my family one way or the other has been affected by stalking
or have had to react to it somehow whether they even realise it or not! The
“dis-ease of each stalker never just affects their primary target it splinters
and exploded into every inch and micro part of society. So...why ignore it?
Somebody is too scared somewhere true or false? Is it because some people find
the behaviour lucrative? If so, who?
Oooooh...doesn't stalking still come down to
one thing...the same thing their need for attention ends up becoming unwanted
attention?
Lavinia: whilst we're not paying attention...but
the sad thing is paying attention and observing others is a natural part of
life. Human beings learn from animals and each other, and of course many other
things! The extent may act as a division...as to our observation or attention
affecting others in such a way as wanted and unwanted! But i tell you what in
all of this for far too long “society” “social causes" and worse yet
politics have been allowed to “treat" deeply rooted medical and clinical
brain health issues...
Too much
of the “handy culture..
Lavinia: instead of having a mentally well
culture! You make or inherit money and your the one who has to be hiding
fighting because too many people have been left mentally untreated, really?
Lavinia: There is one thing we as humans have inside us...and yet we need raise a particular awareness about it, seriously? Its there with us
everyday, yet your leg and your foot back can be treated or get an x-ray easily but what
affects the way you behave and treat yourself and others is just left out
there...its boggles the m8nd beyond belief!
So post Examination does not relate to you
passing your test?
Lavinia: no it doesn't!. But just to go off topic for a bit. Just wondering this Morning....are there "hotspots" where spirits wrestle or fight? For those that know about it....do trance moments in particular locations relate to incidents?
Did you have a panic attack is that why you still haven't followed through?
Lavinia: yes and no. Yes a form of panic occured but the level of responsibility of it all made me flake under the pressure. I hadn't studied properly so the gravity hit me something bad!
Dear God....and now you've gotten so bad....cakes...Lavinia?
Lavinia: yeah you wouldn't believe tgat i prefer a sugar salt wheat gluten fat and anything else that complicates system free diet. But in the passed weeks ive xaved. The "sleep' assaults have been so bad....how convenient that i fund those east london postcode cakes actually kept me awake they are like a gang of people who bought the 1 type car...i used to get cussed out back in the day for not working because i spent a periox of time at home for my child. Now its all day assaulr. I dont understand why this year or what has fully gone on. But i think i seen a link from 2007 this year which seems connected to an incident very early on in 2014.
Does it hurr?
Lavinia: feels like this has all gone beyond pain. The violation is just..
So clear. I didn't go out to work for people to end being stalked....
I get the impression this feels like the years when rapist were allowed to defend themselves by being allowed try their victim or something like that!
Lavinia: i have long been suspicious that someone powerful made a decisions that may have made a mess. But mot only that...i never know if im dealing with people who have broken into my home etc.
This must taking up all the strength you have and some....which area were you working in 2007 that connected the dots for you... because somebody must be responsible?
Lavinia: 2007 was so hostile....i worked in the erith area for part of that year if that is even correct.
Ok...i mean there can be a number of reasons for that connection...is that when the pattern of someone who make it look like they had stolen things from in your house and strategically placed them outside?
Lavinia: Yes...from about 2006 things began to switch..by 2007 all i remember experiencing such a level of spiteful jealousy...
..yes....that you could only describe as "morbid jealously"....talk to me about the "road to Damascus" story?
Lavinia: clairaudience is how i know it. I just kept hearing a spirit guide? Say...see its really difficult to explainor describe how that communication works...plus...i have never really researched how it is possible. I know i was smashed in the back of the head....so that might be a reason...many of my generation came up during wire flex beatings which left a whole generation overly sensitive in older years managing injury as gifts! Anyway the long and short of it referrred....someone maybe being healed or changing track or goes through somekind of awakening or conversion from one path to the other one train or thought to the other?
Could that be you and your pending studies?
Lavinia: i hope so. I will get back to it and try my damndest!
Has this helped?
Lavinia: yes...i have really found it has...this kind of therapy helps to remove layers of pain fog and numbness...when i produce sessions like this i begin to feel my direction alot clearer.
So only some layers come off? Which must mean so much more is buried. What are you still struggling with?
Lavinia: the extent and gravity of the abuse especially when you work with or for people....and someone is able to come up within that and violate not just you but them too...and we are all left coping with something or some one few can mention explain or talk about! Especially, in an industry that is not that hard but there are challenges there which also makes it not that easy!
Is it difficult to assertain who is...or maybe isn't as safe?
Lavinia: whilst i bang on about it....being stalked i mean....what has happened during the years mentioned. Hasn't only happened to me...
The thing is...when things like that happen unless there is a big breakthrough it all can feel very stagnant like there is no one to trust, or no way out.
Lavinia: very true! But that is the state of every where...which is why the world in general is the way it is. It is not that there are not healthy people out there doing great and wobderful things...
Good Morning, Lavina...
Lavinia: Good Morning!
Is it a case of the good people are doing is somewhat buried under layers...do you thing?
Lavinia: as I woke this Morning Gratefully and Thankfully...a conversation was pounding away in my head....which went alittle something like this: if the world was truthfully and honestly run by medical and clinical truths alone like maths...you know....that you cannot question or argue with in a good way nor in a cover up non questionable way...regardless of how yoy put it 2 + 2 = 4/ 1+1=2. For my i was thinking that would be the best climate change ever. Because if you are medically and clinically well as a collective you will most certainly be less destructive in general. If it was like diseases were healed properly, and disorders were never allowed to become full blown to the point they can proling any abuse. I am sure this world woukd not have as much people piled up in hospiral and jail starving their brains and bodies!
What do you think your biggest lesson to date is...apart from all you need to learn to get things you want doing done?
Lavinia: i have always been so trusting ...believing in the good over evil and trying to see the best in everyone and not what real....which worked to a certain extent...until met with jealously...now whilst i still maintain that I have always seen whats real...but once i made the choice after abuses not to be constantly down on myself and after recently not fully understanding what is going on around me...i ask myself this and it includes me too despite knowing my own injuries affect much. I ask myself: People wuth what?
So....that is people with.... ehat? What power? What authority? And are ruling with what?
Lavinia: i came to this earth and soon after my life quickly became about beung rushed back to hospital, and growing up as a clinic out patient. So...you can appreciate where my ideas about genuine honest and truthful medical and clinical expertise where each individual is sane and well enough to be the ruling management of the world began!
Seeing others suffer especially when they have no recognition of what a better health is...can be incomprehensible to sime people....did being stalked worsen your health?
Lavinia: as a survivor all kinds of abuses and stalkers....i cannot say...or maybe i can.....the truth is i already had existing complications with my health which i learnt to manage. Did being stalkes add pressure and cause ne further stress? Yes! Did being stalked trigger further stress or conditions? I cannot confirm or deny either because i am just not qualified? Did i menopause early due to feeling not diagnosed but feeling traumatized by antics? Questions i cannot truthfully or factually answer because i am not trained that way. Tell you what....
What?
Lavinia: i didn't intentionally set out to make things worse for myself at all. But i do live with a certain amount challenges. As an artist returning to my works the way i did was unexpected. As I have said before....i felt so self - conscious about my work. Moving on to fictional faces was just that for me nobodies faces is as flat as paper, or a line. I do not go around taking pictures of people and the recreating it. You go anywhere in the world and you will find a world of many people some with upturned noses, slim ir board faces, some with down turned noses, flat noses, high noses, people with similar faces to similar faces exist all over the world. Unless, you have had a sitting with a particular artist why woykd you believe an artists creations refer to you? Created the following art collection (link beliw) about the stages of creating a face. Most poignant to me was the clothes with a zip on the shoulder. The faces are just how the pieces worked out not related to anyones I known or seen. But as faces go they are bound to resemble one human being or the other!
Everybodies Tight Lipped
I'm wondering is it possible that due trauma...possibly due to the energy and psyche of so many possibly who maybe living in an enforced silence. Stalkers, high scale sociopaths who can appear so sluck and put together in their campaigns almost always vome up with the most delectable campaigns of surprises and mysterious which easily allows them to gain control of people and money. I am wondering if the trauma somehow has you trapped almost to the point that it has your mind believing that you are painting fiction when in fact you may be creating those who had been targeting you? Or who may be asked too? And those who are just drawn to your work? Because ao much art is based or housed in the insecurities, diseases, or disorders of an artist it can be hard for you to poke your head out long enough for any long lasting realization to occur? No? Or yeah?
Lavinia: i must have admit i have looked around at times and have seen people look similar, only! Have people affected me to the extent you have described, yes! For instance, my ability to be destracted had become so dangerous I have never been so glad to not have kids around me!
I have thankfully remained aware during numbness toward many things and people that i normally wouldn't react that way!
Let me just rap this up now!
Alot people who survive stalking and abuses are people who main aim is to focus on keeping their lives on teack it is not that they do not notice or do not care. They also realise the difficulty the stalker may have with their own perceptions etc. Lavinia admits she is not only from a racially mixed back ground but is also is, and is from a legally mixed backround also, and understands that add a further gravity to her circumstances which requires a greater capacity to overcome.
But let me ask you this for the purposes of a Coarse Work workshop: ...if we all consider a medically and clinically orientated world rather than the legally political world we have now exactly what changes and challenges would see or would we become? If from today every prisoner in jail or otherwise could decide, is able to decide to become all round highly medically and clinically trained up person - properly, genuinely, truthfully trained, without disordered personality syndromes at the helm prolonging abuses and therefore suffering: how much more suffering will be created? How much suffering will be radically eradicated? Would we dies as young as we do? Isn't to live to a 100+ years is too young to die?
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To all those whose energy reaches us back on earth and inspires writings such as this.
I give thanks and unrelenting gratitude....as they inspire and touch our minds and hearts in every moment!
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Thank you for inspiring peace and healing fir the good of all concerned, amen!
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Natural Flowism
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A Freedom of Being!
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